09 November 2006

Inconvenience Store


I've been here long enough to need to go grocery shopping. C'mon, I can't eat highly corrosive fish and chips all the time. And while food shopping here isn't as difficult as in Japan, I'm still having some trouble. Yes, there's the ever-present 'ou'-flavor. As in "Beef-flavoured tea" or "damson flavour jam." And yes, there is still some confusion as to what exactly is the need for two sets of names for things like eggplants, zucchini or fried-blood-scab-sausage. But the thing that may cause me the most trouble is the fact that I can't always actually attempt the act of purchasing food.

Stores here tend to close around 5:00 PM. Like, every single weekday. Some of the more radical ones stay open 'til 6. You want something after that? Hard cheese, old chap. You'll just have to wait until Sunday. Between the hours of 11 and 4. Maybe. And if you've happened to wind up needing, say, food, well, you'd best head to the pub. Yeah. After hours in this part of London your only options for food at the late hour of 7:20 are a pub, a bar that serves food, or a 40 minute train trip into London where you'll be able to find something at, er, a pub. Or maybe one of those chi-chi restaurants where the chef has his own TV special and a plate of artistically arranged pasta will set you back $37 plus tip.

And there is no such thing as a Kwik-E-Mart.

Oh, you can go to a "Food Shoppe" on a "motorway." Assuming you have a car and about forty minutes to drive to get to a place that sells microwave wraps, diet cola and little tiny baggies of salt and vinegar chips.

Which they will insist on calling "crisps."

I wonder how long it's going to be until I resort to some other way to get a meal here...

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