Fuck you. Fuck you all very much.

My contract to teach English at (and engage in international exchange events with) the elementary schools of Chiyoda ward, Tokyo is almost over. Two more weeks and I'll be done. And now, after what seemed to be an endless supply of futile repetition, frustrating setbacks, injuries and insults, I'm finding out what the response has been. It looks as though I was appreciated by the teachers, who rarely could be bothered to raise their heads when they were in the class with me, and the parents, whose snot-nosed children apparently managed to retain a line or two of English after spending the class screaming like sugar-addled Tourrette's sufferers or staring sullenly into the blank expanse of obedience and consumerism that would make up the rest of their lives.

What kind of bullshit is this? If you really think that what I was doing was worthwhile, then get off your flat, lazy ass and shut your students up when they spend the class teasing anyone who can muster the confidence to try and speak. And when your children come home and want to continue playing games where they slap anyone and anything in their field of vision to see what will pay them any attention, correct those mucus-smeared little apes. After a year of putting up with all kinds of crap, hearing "we really appreciate what you've been doing" seems like the most obnoxious, bald-faced insult I could imagine. If they really appreciated it, why didn't they make any effort to help me?

One thing I've learned fairly thoroughly about Japan is that the more polite, respectful and honorific the language gets, the less it has to do with the actual feelings of the speaker. "We're most ashamed for being unable to explain this undesired situation" is most often used by your supervisor who isn't even going to explain why you're about to be screwed, refused or abused in the name of the company. "It is truly awful that your situation has become so difficult" means "since no easy solution is at hand, I'm going to assume you'll be too polite to ask me to do more than say how bad your situation is." "You must have become exhausted after completing such a working day" is another way to say "Oh, you're leaving before me."

This year I've had up it to my neck. And now the good people of Chiyoda ward along with my dipshit managers are just all a-gush with compliments and gratitude and "hail-fellow-well-met" bonhomie. They can jam it all right up their collective ass.